The Man Upstairs

So it's been almost a year since I last posted. So much has happened and I have some life lessons to share.

I was looking at this new header my lovely wife made me and it hit me. This picture sums up my last year.

This last years walk with God has been a tough one. And let me tell you it's all my fault.

I was faced with a decision to either move back to Vermont and help out my Grandfather who was not doing so hot or stay in Montana. Jenn had just got a job and things were finally looking up for us, but not for my Grandfather. I kept asking my Pastors what to do and they said "Pray about it. If that's where God wants you then no matter how tough it is, and it will be tough, you'll know that's where you should be."

Well who has the time to wait on or even ask God?!

I didn't.

My Dad was trying to move things along quickly, saying "go! Go! GO!"

So I had to follow suit because he is my Dad. My representation of the Mighty Man Upstairs. I want to do well by him so I Am GOING. And my wife, God bless her, went along for the ride, supporting me at every turn.

And just like that I up rooted our life and moved back to my home town, that never felt like home. Don't get me wrong my family has made me feel welcome, but Wilmington Vermont is like a round hole and I am a square peg.

Right away we are met with contempt. We didn't arrive soon enough, we weren't doing enough. From every angle it just wasn't enough.

And Heaven forbid anyone listen to us.

We felt abandoned.

Alone.

And not once did we talk to God about it. Ask him what to do.

My Grandfather is gone now and I am glad we had one more birthday together and that we spent his last good days together. BUT.... Yup, that is a big but.

But my relationships with my Dad and Grandmother are strained. My Dad doesn't much care for me because I had to leave. Yes we left suddenly, but sometimes a line needs to be drawn, and you reach a breaking point.

If I had talked to God, chances are things would have gone better. Instead of moving, it would have just been a long visit. I was too concerned with pleasing my earthly father that I wasn't concerned with my heavenly one.

I just cut him out. I didn't have time for him.

I learned the hard way as most of us do, that you can only serve one God and it better be an all knowing God too. Chasing money? Nothing good will come. Chasing approval where it doesn't come easily? Nothing good will come. Chasing after anything that isn't the Man Upstairs and nothing good will come.

Listen, I know that reading this one might think I am upset with my Father, but I'm not. He is only human so I can only expect him to be nothing more than human. And I will always forgive him because God tells me to and he's the one I need to trust.

See like the picture above we have to watch were we step. Some boards will break out from under us because they can't support our weight. Some boards just aren't there when we need them. Other boards won't break no matter what you do to it. If you are careful you'll make it to the end, but you'll probably have some bruises.

Welcome 2010.